We had our last Bible study tonight with my son, Sean, there. Although it was a good time of prayer and teaching, it was also sad because I thought about the years that have passed and how much I'm going to miss him. He graduates from high school on the 15th and then will be moving to Georgia to live with his dad.
As hard as it is to let him go, I feel like it's time. He has such a sweet spirit and a good head on his shoulders, so I'm not all that worried about him. I know that God will be with him wherever he goes, and He can take care of him better than I ever could. He's had some great Christian friends in his life for the last three or four years who have mentored him and prayed for him through those tough early teen years and even now as he prepares to leave. I'm so blessed to have him in my life. In so many ways, he's a special person. And I love him.
I've been feeling all sorts of things lately because of this upcoming change in our lives. I know he is excited because he's missed his dad terribly over the years. And his dad has missed out on most of his growing up, so I know they are both looking forward to being together for a while. The selfish part of me wants to keep him here with me forever. As my daughter learned from an old episode of Dick VanDyke recently, that's what you call "selfish love."
I think Dick was teaching his son about a duck...but the same principle applies...
Bittersweet. Saying goodbye to his boyhood, but looking forward to his adulthood. He is covered in prayer, so I know he'll be fine.
I, on the other hand, am another story all together.